Pancakes for me and eggs and biscuits for him. I have to say, the biscuits and gravy were interesting. I mean, I've never had sausage gravy and biscuits that had a serious taste of butter to it. Like serious butter flavor. The biscuits were frozen I'm sure but they wouldn't have been too bad were they cooked all the way through. They were just a bit pasty.
Okay so breakfast isn't their strong suit. Got it.
S drops me off and heads to the golf store in search of a belt. Yes, he forgot a belt. No, I didn't have that on my list for some reason. Just plain didn't think about it.
I check in and sit in the “lounge” waiting for the person to come get me. I had two images in my Pinterest that I wanted to use for my hair. There was this one and this one. Yeah. That was a disaster. I don’t know what part of front like this and back like this she didn’t seem to understand, but it didn’t look anything like that. I didn’t take any pictures of the back, but I could feel that she made these rosettes in the back of my head, three of them. That’s so NOT what I wanted. Thank goodness I had the veil to cover that part up.
But I’m getting ahead of myself.
My hair is like cotton candy. I tell everyone that I could have the beginning of dreadlocks in about a week. It’s true. It just mats together easily and in no time at all. So what does she do? She rubs this product in my hair, essentially matting it together, then takes a fine toothed comb and starts yanking my hair straight from the root. Yeah. That’s SO not the way to comb my hair. I usually use a wide toothed comb to do that, THEN a fine toothed comb. There’s less damage to my hair and the knots come out easier.
Once it’s all combed out and wads of hair are on the floor, she used a curling iron to curl my hair. I thought for sure rollers would be the easiest and best way to go, but nope. Curling iron. And burns my head and pulls out more hair in the process. All the while I’m sitting there thinking, beauty has its price. It better be beautiful.
When all is curled, she commences with the teasing for height. “What height?” you’re asking? Yeah. I don’t see it in the pictures either. So, more pointless torture. The way she pinned it in the back, she pretty much flatten it all out again. There was no height and it was lopsided. Lopsided. And now it’s an hour already. We’re supposed to meet the officiant at 12:45 in the lobby, it’s 11 and I’m not even dressed yet. AND she’s not even finished!
Now I’m just thinking, “Please just finish so I can go.” I don’t have the luxury to tell her she’s screwed it up and it’s lopsided. AND I have these wads of hair in the back of my head. The words, “I’m not so concerned with the way the back looks at the top, this just shows how I want it to be curly in the back” did come out of my mouth and was promptly ignored. She obviously felt my hair needed these things and put them there.
FINALLY she hoses me down with hair spray. I felt like I was in an 80s movie at this point with all the aerosol spray shellacking my head. S shows up to take me back to the room so we can get dressed. You have NO idea how happy I was to see him rescue me from this mess.
We quickly dress, I put on my make up. We take pictures and head down to the lobby to wait. And wait. And wait a little more. I was nervous, antsy, something. Standing still wasn’t my strong suit. I put on his boutonniere and stand there some more.
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